Classic Liberal Blog

Senate Okays Redneck History Month

Lawmakers today congratulated themselves on the latest achievement in their series, A Celebration of Diversity™. The NBC cafeteria is planning a full-service menu to commemorate this historic event ...

Notes From the Tea Party “Convention”

I believe the idea of “nationalizing” this movement through the vehicle of a “convention” was a foolish endeavor from the word go. I think it bastardizes in every way imaginable all the good that came from and will come from the Tea Party movement and inevitably distracts from its core message / image – as American citizens gathering in protest and opposition to an overreaching government hellbent on fundamentally changing this great nation and jeopardizing the freedom and security of future generations. The movement is about average Americans making a statement to their elected officials that business as usual will not be tolerated and about Right-Wingers and free-thinkers sending a message that “organized” political dissent is no longer independently owned and operated by the ideological Left.

A Case of Natural Selection ...

There's a simple way to avoid shark attacks. Stay out of their house. At the very least, if you plan to go into the ocean, leave your human arrogance on the beach along with your shoes and remember that you are out of your element. And when there are THOUSANDS of predators right offshore, find something else to do for entertainment.

Who whoulda thunk it - high taxes chase rich people away!

New Jersey's past two governors, Democrats Jim McGreevey and Jon Corzine, followed the liberal, progressive playbook right down the line. Rule #1 is "raise taxes on the rich". And raise taxes they did!

Yup. When the wealth leaves town the tax revenue dries up. It's one reason New Jersey is facing an almost $10 trillion dollar budget shortfall this year.

Yikes!

More “hope” and “change” heading our way.

Obama Preparing For One Or Possibly Two Supreme Court Nominations.

Farm Subsidies – Ripe for Budget Cutting?

Honorable Secretary of Agriculture
Washington, D.C.

Dear Sir;

My friend, Ed Peterson, over at Wells Iowa, received a check for $1,000 from the government for not raising hogs. So, I want to go into the “not raising hogs” business next year.

What I want to know is, in your opinion, what is the best kind of farm not to raise hogs on, and what is the best breed of hogs not to raise? I want to be sure that I approach this endeavor in keeping with all governmental policies. I would prefer not to raise razorbacks, but if that is not a good breed not to raise, then I will just as gladly not raise Yorkshires or Durocs.

As I see it, the hardest part of this program will be in keeping an accurate inventory of how many hogs I haven’t raised.

My friend, Peterson, is very joyful about the future of the business. He has been raising hogs for twenty years or so, and the best he ever made on them was $422 in 1968, until this year when he got your check for $1000 for not raising hogs.

If I get $1000 for not raising 50 hogs, will I get $2000 for not raising 100 hogs? I plan to operate on a small scale at first, holding myself down to about 4000 hogs not raised, which will mean about $80,000 the first year. Then I can afford an airplane.

Now another thing, these hogs I will not raise will not eat 100,000 bushels of corn. I understand that you also pay farmers for not raising corn and wheat. Will I qualify for payments for not raising wheat and corn not to feed the 4000 hogs I am not going to raise?

Also, I am considering the “not milking cows” business, so send me any information you have on that too.
In view of these circumstances, you understand that I will be totally unemployed and plan to file for unemployment and food stamps.

Be assured you will have my vote in the coming election.

Patriotically Yours,

I was gonna do a post ...

…but then I got high.